Will you be/are you a helicopter parent?

[Daddy Clay]

In my career as a teacher, I really dreaded those parents that contested every grade and took up the kids cause no matter what the offense. But as a parent, I feel my opinions shifting. Is being involved really so bad? Isn't the opposite even worse? We want to defend our kids, but know they also must learn to take responsibility and fend for themselves. How to balance?

[Uncle Sutts]

I can read your post, so I have to thank a teacher, or two. As an EMT, parents that hover frequently got in the way and delayed getting things done. True be it apples to oranges of course. The tough part of dealing with something like that, especially now that you're on both sides of that proverbial coin, is objectivity. Taking a good long look at whatever be it from outside your own shoes and seeing it for what it is, and then dealing with it accordingly.

I however plan to attend my first set of teacher conferences with a Pink Floyd shirt on, along with some classic Angus Young-style knickers, maybe wingtips, an ipod in one hand and a yo-yo in the other. That's my version of balance. Humor vs. rationality. I give ALOT of credit to teachers, for their mission and their patience. Especially those who had me for anything. One I saw not too long ago said she would've written more but the sleeves on her straight jacket were too tight and she couldn't reach her crayons.....;) On the real, parents like that are just as closed-minded as their kids. Sad but true. If the PARENTS do that now, imagine the kids when they get older. Ohhhhhhh boy. Culture at work. go figure....lol

Bri-

[Daddy Clay]

Throwing my Pink Floyd shirt on now before heading over to my kid's school to watch him in a performance.

[Meredith]

I know where your coming from. I was a ballet teacher before my youngest was born and I can tell you we get some crazed parents, where ever there is preforming involved there are the most insane sets of parents.
My son is 12 and so hes just now starting to get into the level of school where grades and stuff are important. Whenever he tells me about tests he doesn't do as great on or something of that nature I want to jump on it, its hard to not be able to help with everything but in reality its not really worth it to try and be over involved in his education. I think at a young age its important for parents to be really involved but its just a matter of knowing when to step back and let them be independent.
I personally had a lot of trouble with this as a young parent I always felt like the other parents in the class didn't think I was good enough, so I pushed to prove them wrong by being really involved and helping my son do well. Once he started getting older it was hard at first to just step away a little. I'm still involved (sometimes more than he would want) but I like to think that I am hovering over him as much as before.

[Rob O.]

I'm of the "Love & Logic" school of thought - kids need to learn to be accountable for their own actions - to learn of the consequences through experience rather than lectures. Better that they learn the "hard" way when they're very young and the price they're paying is relatively cheap than for them to have to learn these lessons later in life.

Of course, my little guy is still a coupla years away from Kindergarten, so it's easy for me to talk the talk on this and not have to walk the walk yet... But I the same principles are already in practice (to a certain degree). If he gets fidgety or picky and won't finish his meal, away from the table he goes only to discover how his hungry little tummy is rumbling long before the next mealtime. Cheap price - invaluable lesson.